World Cupdate: Clownfraud Özil can't even finish his own created chances

For the fourth time in the last five World Cups, the reigning champions are out of the competition in group play, as Germany's 2-0 loss to South Korea saw them tumble to dead last in the group. With such a historic collapse for the Germans, who are accustomed to strolling into the late rounds of major competitions without much effort, the obvious question on everyone's lips is "Who is to blame for this?"

Fortunately, there is an equally obvious culprit. One man upon whom it is easy and just to dump all of Germany's problems -- Mesut Özil.

Look at that horrible monster of a man. How could he do this to the lovely people of Germany? Now, some people might argue that "well, actually, the entire team as a whole played pretty poorly in the World Cup, and there is ample room for criticism of the staff as well, with everything from squad selection to line-ups to tactics very much debatable." Maybe you'd say, "how about the fact Özil created more chances in the game than any other player in any other match at this World Cup?" Are you wondering, "how about the two sitters on plates he delivered to players who thoroughly biffed them, which would have instead seen him hailed as the two-assist savior?"

Pah. That's nonsense.

It was Özil's fault, and to not acknowledge that is to be legally insane. Don't believe me, Mr. But His Job is to Create Chances and He Created a Record Amount While Also Chipping in a Healthy Chunk of Tackles for Good Measure? Well how's this for stats for you -- in Germany's second match at the World Cup, when they desperately needed a win to keep their hopes alive, how many key passes did Özil have then? Zero.

Total fraud. Nicking a living.

Elsewhere, Mexico did everything they could to blow their six-point start but were undone by Germany's superior crash-and-burning, while Brazil and the Swiss booked spots in the knockout stages in Group E.

On today's docket, the very fun Group H where at least one smaller side is guaranteed advancement, and a match between Belgium and England which will pit two teams trying desperately to lose while looking like they're trying, in order to get into the much softer half of the bracket (at least on name value) that the group's second place team will be slotted into. Should be fun.